IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
