I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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