next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
i need some magic done to my vagina
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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