From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
