Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
