I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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