my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
