Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Randomize
