awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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