can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
