My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
