Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize
