Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
