were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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