you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
