i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
