I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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