I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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