so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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