I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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