I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
