I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
false alarm. still invincible.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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