Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
