Porn is love you can see.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
