a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
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