Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
