he was CRYING into my vagina
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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