with your own penis?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
