Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you didnt know i had herpes?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Randomize
