also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
