JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
The Olympian is in my bed
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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