i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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