He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
