If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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