i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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