Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
