White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
