I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
