im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
