i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize