Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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