Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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