Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
