She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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