I want to stick my p in your. b.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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