How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We left the knife in your bed.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
