bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Randomize
