Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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