we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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