can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
