You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
