oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He? As in you personified your dick?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
